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:: Chidori Haruka 千鳥春華 ::
+August 15th 1985+

Happy Chinese New Year and Valentine's!!!
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Sunday, December 12, 2004

風...I can feel the wind again...

I've always thought of you as a friend...and have always wanted to keep it that way. But sometimes, just sometimes, I can feel myself attracted to you, my mind let astray...into thoughts of you. I've always dismissed these endearing thoughts, but now...these feelings have gotten stronger and stronger. Is it because you were always there for me? Or is it because you were always willing to hear me out? Or is it because you always had a way to make me laugh?

Yes, I admit I've always enjoyed your presense. And yes, I also admit I've always cared for you. But lately, I started to have to urges to hug you, and even to kiss you, to give you warmth from the coldness in your heart. I yearn to hear your voice... and wait desperately for your news...waiting for my static handphone to vibrate, to receive your sms that never came.

A part of me tells me these feelings will pass, that these emotions are just temporary. I still want to treat you just as a friend, a friend who understands me and cares for me. But the other part of me is constantly thinking of you, wanting to meet you as much as I could. Thinking that we could move a step further than just friends...

I wish...that these feelings would disappear....
I wish...that we could remain just friends forever....
I wish...you would always be there for me....
I wish...I could hug you and lean on your shoulders when I'm out cold....
I wish........

Am I in denial?


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