Because you're...you....

Missing you. Damn bad.

Although not as bad as before, but the missing part is still there.

Not too long ago, when I told someone I miss you, he asked me whether I'm in love with you.

And my direct reply is. "NO"

Straight forwardly, unhesitantly. Without battling an eyelid.

While all this while, I have been missing you on and off, again and again...well perhaps not as strong as the other half, but still it's there. And it's really bugging me off.

"When you love a person, you will miss him."

But when you miss a person, do you love him?

Now, that's a question to ponder upon.

Christmas...and the coming valentine. And I'm all alone again.

Not physically alone, but spiritually.

In actual fact, if you were to ask me out on any of these occasion, I would be more than happy to do so.

But you didn't. And you won't. Because...you're.....you.

I even took the initiative to invite you out on christmas, but you said it will be boring, and didn't want to.

Oh well, there goes.

Perhaps I didn't ask properly enough, perhaps I was beating around the bush, but the answer is still....no.

I guess these emotions will fade soon. Real soon.

But I owe you too much. More than I can bear. Too much kindness to repay. You were always there to support me when I was REAL down, when I was really suffering deep inside. You always had a way to make me laugh, with all your weird antics and bubbly personality. And I feel bad I have not been the same true friend to you.

Soon, I will return all these back to you. I will repay you in some way, maybe just over a cup of tea or an outing.

And then, it will be over. Nothing else to pull my heart down.

After nearing 3 years of painstaking unrequited love towards the other half, I've at last learnt to fully let go of him, and wish him all the best in his life. Although I still love him, but in another way. The true friend way.

And now, that leaves only you in my heart. The silent one who was creeping into my heart bit by bit, insignificantly...but stronger and stronger by the day. The one that I have so defiantly tried to deny.

And it's a relief, it will all over soon.

At last, a break.

Unless...you decide to take some action...

But because you're...you....

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風...I can feel the wind again...